The Snow of Innocence
by GoingToCalifornia
Summary: BN please R&R. Oneshot. Blair wasn’t one for walking with no destination. She liked destinations. Nate and Yale had been her ultimate destination, but now here she was in Central Park walking in the snow in the vague direction of nowhere all by herself.


**A/N: I know everyone BN fan must _still_ be doing cartwheels after _The News_ and _The Pictures_ but here's my little fluff about the unknown. I basically put the pictures into an order which I thought made sense and then wrote a songfic using the world's single most obscure song, (I'd never heard it before either.)**

**I don't own anything BTW, except Nate.**

* * *

Blair wasn't one for walking with no destination. She liked destinations. Nate and Yale had been her ultimate destination, but now here she was in Central Park walking in the snow in the vague direction of nowhere all by herself.

Yale was out of the question; she had screwed everything up; maybe it wasn't meant to be. She should have backed down when she went to pieces in the interview; she shouldn't have pursued it because she wasn't good enough for Yale. Yale wanted the people like Dan, not the scheming bitches like Blair Waldorf -no matter how much money she could persuade people into funding.

She'd royally fucked up any chance she'd had. She'd got detention and then been expelled. Within the space of a month every blot on her permanent record had appeared. Her record was probably even more marred than Serena van der Woodsen's by now. If only she had contracted glandular fever and had missed the past month of school. If only she hadn't been so busy with Chuck Bass to write that stupid paper properly. None of this would have happened, she would have maintained her A average and Miss Carr wouldn't have needed punishing and then she wouldn't have got detention and then Miss Carr wouldn't have needed to be made an example of by everyone's favourite internet blogger.

And then there was Nate. She'd ruined any chance of their happily ever after quite some time ago and for what? There was no way that everything would have turned out like this if she'd been with him the whole time. He would have stopped her from making the stupid decision to trick Miss Carr and he would have saved her the humiliation she'd suffered when she told Chuck Bass she loved him and when she'd seen him with those girls. She didn't love Chuck Bass, she didn't love anyone who made her feel that way. Nate had never made her feel that way and she missed the way he always made her feel loved and safe. He'd know what to do now. It would be a completely pointless stoned answer like: "Let's get some hot chocolate," but at least it would make her feel like he cared.

_In this city when a powder snow comes dancing  
down from heaven,  
my sigh fades white up to sky  
When the I think about you,  
I don't know why but  
my heart gets so warm..._

Nobody cared now. Her mother had sent Handsome away, Dorota seemed to think Blair was being reckless and her Father was "disappointed." Only one other person had ever been disappointed in Blair and that was the only other man she loved, Nate. He hadn't said "disappointed" but it was exactly the same feeling; she had recognized it. Like she had not lived up to expectations, but not that she'd not done enough, she'd gone too far. She'd gone to far "slandering" Miss Carr -no matter how true it was- and she'd gone too far with Chuck. She still couldn't understand why she had given it up to Chuck when all she had ever wanted was Nate.

She kicked at the snow drifts forming at the side of the path while the white glitter fell all around her. The great thing about Central Park in the snow was the way everything turned white. The sky, the ground, the trees, the grass, the flower beds. Blair found herself wandering slowly further and further from the East 72nd street entrance and further and further to the West side of the park. Then she began heading towards the lake. She hadn't visited there since she had found out about Nate and Serena. Feeding the ducks had always been something they'd done as a threesome. It had felt wrong until right now. She'd wanted the ducks to dematerialise and never have to be remind of the carefree childhood days of her, Nate and Serena. Now, however she was glad they had stayed, like a momentum of their friendship. Something that hadn't changed; a constant.

She stood at the edge of the lake, the flakes of snow still fluttering around her. There were lots of children there to feed the ducks just like they used to. Blair remembered the time Serena had slipped and pushed Blair, who would have fallen in if Nate hadn't caught her. Just then she heard someone call her name and she turned. It was Nate. "Hey!" he grinned and she smiled weakly. "You still come here?" He asked chirpily. Blair couldn't exactly remember when they'd gotten back on speaking terms; when he'd called her maternal?

"Uh, no I don't -not really," Blair said lamely.

"Me neither, I just came down today. You know to get away from it all," Nate shrugged. Blair nodded knowingly. There was a familiarity between them. When he said: "you know," she did know. She knew everything about him. She knew how much his family life sucked and that he and Vanessa had split up. "I've missed you," he whispered. "I heard about everything."

Blair's cheeks flushed. Nate knew? It was amazing the way she still felt a million times worse when Nate found out about her flaws, she wanted to be perfect in his eyes.

"If it helps, I'm not going to college either," Nate tried to comfort her.

"You're not?" Blair looked sceptical. Nate shook his head. "How come?" Nate looked into her eyes sincerely. They were standing imaginably close. He didn't much want to be honest, but he wanted her to know that he still had feelings for her.

"I guess the only reason I was still applying was because I always knew we'd go to Yale and be Blair and Nate forever, but that's not going to happen." Neither of them said anything and Nate shoved his hands in his pockets.

"But that doesn't mean you can't still go to college," Blair said looking up into his eyes in the delicately innocent way of hers where it looks as if she's trying to read his mind. Again Nate paused, Blair didn't understand. She was the only reason he had wanted to go. If she wasn't going, neither was he. The only attraction Yale held was that it was where Blair was going.

"I don't want to go if you're not going to be there." Nate whispered so as nobody could here but somehow Blair did. She looked up at him in disbelief had he really just said that? She needed to pinch herself.

"Really?" She asked and he nodded. "Why didn't you say so before?" She suddenly seemed distant.

"I-I, well, you and Chuck. I didn't want to take you away from him like-"

"Like he did." Blair finished his sentence. They stood for a moment.

"I've missed you." Nate whispered caressing her face; stroking her hair away. He rubbed his thumb on her cheek softly. Blair softened, his touch felt nice, much kinder than Chuck's ever had.

"I missed you too."

"We had so much together," Nate whispered. Blair felt her eyes glazing over, her face began to burn where Nate was touching her and her heart beat increased.

"Can we fix it?" She whispered. Nate smiled at the look in her face, as if she'd just put her heart on the line.

He stepped closer. "Of course we can. We're Blair and Nate."

"It's just meant to be." She whispered as he leant in towards her. She moved forward, her eyes fluttering closed, desperate to feel his lips on hers. He towered over her and he bent down to meet her and strongly took control of the kiss as their lips caressed one another's. She loved the way he completely controlled her for the small time. His arm held her body immeasurably close and made her feel warm and safe against him, while he held her head with his other hand and she held onto him desperately. His tounge slowly parted her lips and began roaming her mouth and she did the same. Feeling the way she always felt when she kissed Nate. It wasn't like kissing a stranger, they fitted so well, and she knew everything; nothing was a guess.

_Pure snow Pure heart  
It was snowing on the day we met too.  
I felt a fate upon us  
more heart-wrenching than passion,  
more truthful than love._

As they slowly came apart after a long time. Their foreheads fell together and they both smiled happily at one another.

"That was nice," Blair murmured and Nate grinned and leant in to kiss her all over again because he could kiss her all day if he wanted.

_In times like these,  
what gives me support  
is a single picture._

**A/N: Please, please review! I love reviews more than anything even rubbish ones because reviews in general make me happy. Please please please!!! I'm as manipulative as Blair aren't I?**


End file.
